Last week I wrote about my experiences of loneliness in motherhood. I have been blown away by the responses I had about it, and I don’t think there is a single person who was able to say they haven’t felt lonely at one point or another in their time as a parent.
Although it is always nice to know that others feel the same way as you, that doesn’t actually help us to resolve the problem does it? While we know it is very common to feel alone, that doesn’t mean we have to just accept it for what it is. So I’ve been looking at what we can do to help!
I think the key thing to remember is that everyone is different, and so what works for one person may not work for everyone else. As such, it didn’t seem sensible for me to only share my tips for coping – I’ve asked around to see what other people have done too! I’ve collated them into the top 5 tips for coping with loneliness.
1. Reach Out Online
Katy recommends looking for mum friends online. Like Katy, I have met some amazing people who just live on my phone! It can seem a bit strange at first, but you can really get to know someone you met online if you want to.
Lucy has made some great friends online, and even set up a whatsapp group with them so they can be in regular contact even though they live all over the country. Having someone to sound board off or get advice when you’re feeling lonely is really beneficial, and online friends can provide that if you don’t feel like you have it with your other friends.
2. Join A Baby Group
Jenna recommends joining a baby group, but Emma points out that you shouldn’t be disheartened if the first one isn’t for you. There will be lots of groups to choose from and you will find the right kind of people for you.
I know that for me, free play groups didn’t suit me. I found them intimidating and I was uncomfortable at the. Instead, classes such as Rhythm Time, Kinder Gym or swimming that had structure I found far more enjoyable. Over time I was then able to pluck up the courage to speak to others, and I now have people that I speak to regularly at our classes.
3. Learn To Enjoy Your Own Company
Laura thinks it is important to enjoy your own company too. Fill your days with things to look forward to, even if it’s just scheduling in a favourite TV show, reading a book or a long soak in the bath, being kind to yourself is key.
4. Get Out Of The House
I always feel worse on the days when we have nothing planned. Simply putting our coats on and going out to walk the dog can make things seem better. It doesn’t matter if I don’t actually speak to anyone while I’m out, it just stops cabin fever setting in. Victoria suggests trying to break up the day into segments so it doesn’t feel as long. Knowing that you will be going out to the park at 1pm gives your day structure and stops it dragging.
5. Try A New Hobby
I have never exactly been a fitness fanatic, but when Piglet was 8 weeks old I started to go to a kettle bells class. I went with a friend at first, and then continued to go alone. Although the classes were hard work I appreciated that 1 hour a week that I was able to go and do something for me.
It’s not always easy to get out of the house alone though, so Victoria suggests finding a hobby you can do from home. Something as simple as yoga can give you a bit of me time when you get a quiet moment and stop you feeling so alone. Georgina started her blog for that very reason – and has met some amazing people as a result!
I hope some you give some of these a try. If you have any other suggestions that others may find useful then leave them in the comments below!
If you are a mum with diabetes, why not join our Facebook Group which is hub for women with all different types of diabetes. It is a safe place to ask questions, share knowledge and be open about how you are coping. We have women from all stages in life, from pre-conception, pregnancy, motherhood and beyond.
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